Ode to Running

Running.
 Oh, running!
 How I love to run and go for miles and miles—
 up a hill or down one,
 on a dirt trail or on the gravel.
On a paved road or through the mud.
 Below the redwood trees or through the golden hills.
 On a busy road or deep into a forest
 where I can only hear the sound of the wind breezing through the trees,
and my shoes crunching the fallen leaves, and pounding on the hardened earth.  
 

For exercise or for regulation.
 Part of a regimen or part of what my body needs in any given moment.
 To challenge myself
 or to pause and admire the nature all around me.
For peace.

Running takes me far.
 To beautiful and interesting places
 and it’s taken me far within myself.
 Deep into my soul,
 touching the essence of who I am,
 and pulsing back out,
and noticing tears gliding down my cheeks
 as I am in awe of life all around me and within me.
 Running is beautiful to me.

 Running fast, running slow.
 Running with friends,
 with strangers,
 and running on my own.
 Running and thinking about a conversation that I just had,
Or ones that I want to have.
 Or running and imagining and fantasizing
 as if I were watching myself from the outside,
 wondering why I keep imagining the same thing.

Running with my presence.
 Running with my past.
 Running for my future.

Running because I can—
 able-bodied and channeling my primitive nature of moving my body.
Running and feeling connected to my roots.
Running and feeling liberated.

 Running in the heat of summer,
 my skin getting the chills for how hot it warms against me,
 or running through the rain,
feeling pleasure amongst the loudness of the water,
 and enjoying the sensation of the droplets trickling down my face,
 my hair glued to me,
 and feeling so alive.

Running with food and water,
With a vest,  and a phone.
With a visor and my glasses.
Running with nothing but the clothes I wear and the shoes on my feet.

Running because my body is asking for movement,
 needing to let out energy—any kind of energy.
 Running because I feel confident when I run,
 because I feel my strength.
 Running because I enjoy pushing myself, gaining,
 being able to go for longer and faster,
 exploring the capacity in my body
 and testing my self.
 Running because I felt too cooped up
 and needed to explore the world outside.
 Running to discover new places bright and early
 before everyone else is up.

 Running to chase the sunrise
 and, on occasion, the sunset.
 Running in the dark with the moonlight
 when I dare to adventure before the sun is up.
Running when its the perfect weather for it and running when it isn’t.
 Running to feel good about my body,
 Loving how I feel and how I look.
Running because I don’t like how I look—
Running actively working through this very feeling.
 Running to keep a balance in my life.

Running for community
 and racing, cheering others on.
 Running to connect with the earth and nature
 through my sense of sight and smell.
 Running when there are time constraints,
 grateful that so much can happen even in 30 minutes.
 Running for almost six hours straight,
 amazed at how much my body can do.

 Running to rest
 and let my body relax and settle.
 Running to feel content
 and know that it’s okay to stop.
 Running to find a sense of belonging in the world.
 Running to show up for the world.
Running to get away from all the chaos.

Running has helped me build confidence,
 gratitude,
 community,
 excitement,
 hope,
 strength,
 and resilience,
 and has also allowed me to find softness,
 solitude,
 grief,
 vulnerability,
 and reconciliation.

 Running helped me, when I was 13 years old,
 find a community to belong to amongst friends.
 Running at 33 years old
 to be with myself,
 away from socializing and speaking.
 Running for purpose
 and running without.
 Running with no explanation as to why.
 Running knowing that it feels right.

Running to say hi to the horses,
 goats,
 dogs,
 hawks,
 turkey vultures,
 blue herons,
 egrets,
 finches,
ducks,
 scrub jays,
 Steller’s jays,
 ravens,
humming birds,
 crows,
 cats,
 llamas,
 mules,
 deer,
elk,
 donkeys,
 chickens,
 roosters,
 bobcats,
 bison,
 sheep,
 butterflies,
 dragonflies,
wasps,
bees,
flies,
banana slugs,
snails,
tarantula hawks,
 termites,
 frogs,
 snakes,
lizards,
newts,
skinks,
 eastern and western gray squirrels,
 skunks,
 foxes,
 possums,
 marmots,
 chipmunks,
 mountain lions,
 seals,
whales,
 and dolphins—
 and I’m sure so many, many more.
 Sadly, running to say I am sorry
 to most of these animals
 who have died being run over by passing vehicles.

Running and the sound of the chirping birds.
 Or the startle of a strange animal sound.
Running and trying not to kill any tiny creature.
Running and avoiding cars.
Running a planned route.
Running and planning as I go.
Running and getting lost.

Running with protection.
With pepper spray,
With a taser,
And with a pocket knife my dad asks me to run with.
Running Raw.

Running through rashes and blisters.
Running with no problem!

Running and knowing when its enough.
Running and stopping, feeling good and discovering that it’s enough.
Running and feeling encouraged.
Running with discouragement.
Running mindfully.
Running mindlessly.

Running to discover.
 Running to recover.
 Running with guilt.
Running with grief.
Running when I’m sad.
Running when I’m mad.
 Running for love of myself.

 Running so that I can eat as much as I want today.
 Running to prepare for stillness.
 Running to prepare for movement.
 Running to make me feel better.
 Running heal.
 Running to escape.
 Running to stay connected.
 and stay with the rhythm of my body.

 Running in silence.
 Running listening to podcasts, audiobooks, and music.
 Running to converse and catch up with friends.
 Running to compete with others.
 Running to sweat.
 Running to take in the clouds
 and vistas of the natural world.
 Running to discover cool neighborhoods,
 cars,and houses.
 Running imagining, “What if I lived there?”
 Running and saying hello
 to walkers, runners,
 and everyone else outside.

Running to smell the fresh eucalyptus in the air.
 Or the nutty scent of the trees.
Running through stinging nettle.
Ouch!
Running and trying not to get ticks all over me.
Running through downed trees, moving over and under
like an obstacle course.
Running smoothly.
Running through endless spiderwebs.
Running and tripping.
Close call!
Running and falling.
Hurting.

Running through vineyards amongst the oaks.
Running through snow and desert.
Running amongst a field of flowers.
 Running in familiar places.
 Running in new ones.
Running through unpleasant odors
 and unpleasant interactions with people.

Running for time.
Running for miles.
Running and feeling like a tourist.
Running and feeling home,
One with the earth.
Running without a thought in the world.
Running flooded with so many thoughts and ideas.
Running and comping up with a brilliant idea!

Running noticing my aging self.
Running and feeling so young.
Running with dullness
Running with vibrancy.

Running for pleasure.
 Running through pain.
 Running through discomfort
 and wishing it was over.
 Running so much
 that I wish it would never end.

 Not running and knowing its good for my running.
 Running to learn how to stay healthy,
 even if it means running less.
 Running out of stubbornness.
 Running when I feel belonging.
 Running when I feel lost.
 Running to breathe more.
 Running to exist.

 Running out of excitement
 to wear my new bouncy running shoes.
 Running with miles and miles
 on my old, worn, muddy shoes.
 Running when I feel limber
 and running when I feel tight and stiff.
Running and picking up speed.
Running and slowing down.
 Running alongside my shadow
 and finding satisfaction when the run is done,
 feeling grateful for myself
 and the world around me.

 Running to meet up with someone.
 Running after saying goodbye.
Running into somebody, hello!
 Destination running—
 an out and back,
 a loop,
 a lollipop,
 a random adventure running
 through all the crevices I find.
 Good enough running.
 Running to hit the goal.
 Running at high altitudes in the mountains
 and running by the ocean.
 Running cautiously and smartly.
 Running feeling safe and secure,
 and running feeling spooked and insecure.

 Running and feeling grateful for my feet,
 my knees,
 my hips,
 and glutes.
Running hungry.
Running full.
Running with energy.
Running depleted.
 Running and smiling.
 Running and crying.
 Running and laughing.
 Running to let out some steam.
 Running to quiet everything else.
Running for pride.
Running and feeling humbled.
Running and finding forgiveness.
Running.

Just Running.
For no reason and for every reason.
It feels simple and yet writing about it seems complicated.

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 Running, oh running,
 how you have given me
so many adventures
 within and without me!
And for this, I am thankful.

-Imuri Pacheco